Colorado Couples Counseling with Bryce Mathern, LPC
What Percentage Of People Stay Together After Therapy?

What Percentage Of People Stay Together After Therapy?

Relationships are hard work, life throws you curveballs and you and your partner are bound to face some difficulties. Couples therapy is a great resource for couples who are willing and trying to do everything they can to make it work. But, how successful is couples counseling? What does the road look like after you and your spouse have tried counseling?

Does Marriage/Couples Counseling Work?

There is plenty of skepticism over marriage counseling? Does it really work or does it just postpone the inevitable? The truth is, its normal to feel hesitant in the face of marriage counseling. If you’ve found yourself in this position you and your partner have openly admitted you flaws and sought help, and it can feel embarrassing. While you and your spouse may have agreed, there may still be some awkward air around openly discussing your issues in the face of another and you may have a bad taste in your mouth.

However, couples counseling can be effective, and there are a number of different kinds of marriage counseling options to meet you and your partners needs. The type of therapist you work with, the kind of therapy you chose, or the specific problems that are plaguing your relationship are all factors that are taking into considers during the process.

Statistics On Counseling Success

According to the Journal Of Marital & Family Therapy, couples counseling has nearly a 70% success rate. Healthy couples and a healthy relationship are crucial to society. But with increasing societal pressure, financial stress, and external factors couples face lots of issues along the way that can cause a riff in their relationship. 

Studies show that marriage counseling has significant improvement on enhancing marriage stability. Marriage stability is the constituent balance between two in a relationship. The stability is the foundation of a marriage and improving the stability can lead to a more balanced family unit, work/life balance, and overall higher satisfaction. 

You may feel like you’re the only couple you know that are facing marital issues and seeking counseling. The truth is nearly 50% of couples out of a study of  1000 reported trying counseling with their spouse and the majority of those couples had been married for 3-5 years. From infidelity to communication issues, couples counseling is a fantastic and popular option to seek out. 

When Does Marriage Therapy Work

Studies show that on average couples take around 6 years before deciding to seek counseling. The issue with waiting so long is the fact that the problems that are plaguing your marriage are now deep rooted and will take active work on both parts to solve. So, how do you know if it will work for you? First you need to be willing to work through tough conversations in the face of a therapist. Typically couples who wait long to seek counseling are hesitant to face the truth of what is going on but it takes time to heal. Therapy has proven to be the most successful when both parties involved are willing and able to take the needed time to heal and work through deep rooted issues to find a solution as a team.

How Does Marriage Counseling Work

There are typically three kinds of marriage counseling options based on you and your spouse’s needs and problems. 

EFT is the most common kind of couples counseling. Emotionally focused therapist goal is to create a more secure emotional attachment between two individuals in a relationship.

CBT or cognitive behavioral therapy,  treatment that works to adapt a person’s thoughts and behaviors in order to improve their mood.

The Gottman Method, is an approach therapy that includes assessment of the relationship and research based interventions to help alleviate high stress situations in a relationship. 

How Long Does Therapy Take to Work

Truthfully it depends on the couple and the specific situations they are working through. In general it takes around 8-10 sessions for a couple to feel like they are starting to make a specific process. For the EFT method of counseling there are up to 20 sessions that couples can participate in to fully work through their issues and come out on the other side stronger. 

Couples counseling is a commitment to not only your partner and relationship but it’s a big time commitment that takes active work to find success. Depending on your particular therapist, the kind of therapy you are taking, or the approach they are having you and your spouse work through, your healing journey will be specific to you and your partner! 

What To Expect in Couples Counseling

The best way to tackle couples counseling is by having an open mindset and a willingness to learn and work on your relationship. You can expect to feel moments of anger, sadness, or even loneliness as you and your partner journey down this path. Choosing the right therapist to hear and help heal you and your partner is one of the most important pieces. This will become an intimate and very important relationship. You and your spouse both need to be active in choosing your therapist and finding an individual you trust during the journey. 

Setting realistic goals and timelines is another thing to consider before embarking down this road. If you approach counseling with the idea that one meeting will cure years of marital issues, you may not find the success you’re looking for. Being realistic and truthful with yourself and your partner and dedicating the time needed will allow you to work as a team and conquer the road ahead!